Lessons from a Working Mom-Lesson 106

Not everything is what is seems.
My Grandpa left us his RV when he moved to Hungary. We decided to take advantage of this inheritance-on-wheels and start camping. Our family, along with a group of friends, have become campers and have gone twice in the last three months. It has been SUPER fun and we look forward to the next time we are gonna get out there. It is great fun to hang out with the other families and just relax in the great outdoors while all our kids run around and get to exude the maximum amounts of energy possible. It was on our last relaxing adventure that I did something that definitely doesn't happen everyday - and I sure hope doesn't happen again. Let me set the scene for you...It was late at night, after a long day of fun, friends, food, and festive beverages. Both of our kids were asleep in the awesome RV and so I wanted to turn on as few lights as possible when I entered so they would stay in that state. I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth - and since this is a task that I have done many a-time - didn't feel that I needed to turn on the light. Using the light of the moon through the bathroom window,  I picked up my toothbrush and the toothpaste, spread on a good helping of the paste on to the brush, and went to work. It must have been a good minute or two of brushing before I stopped to spit...or try to spit...out the paste. Oddly, it was sticking to my teeth. I ran my tongue over my teeth and realized the paste didn't taste normal... I must have accidentally used my husband's crazy organic toothpaste that tastes like it sounds. But...no...this paste was sticky...slick...This is when I decided to risk waking the kids and turn on the light. I picked up the tube of paste I had so generously applied to my brush and flipped it over...only to find out that I had brushed my teeth with....A&D ointment. Yes, that is correct, I used the same ointment that I had previously used on my daughter's diaper rash to freshen my breath. After freaking out and reading all the warning labels on the tube - and getting some major convincing from my husband - I decided that I wasn't going to die of A&D poisoning but I did realize that being a mom wields weird hazards that wouldn't present themselves if you didn't have kids (such as using diaper rash ointment to brush your teeth). Being tired -and having a glass of wine- definitely intensifies these hazards. So, what is the lesson to be learned in all of this? Well, we need to be more aware of the mom-hazards that are all around us, we need to pack the baby's items separately from the bathroom toiletries and, above all, A&D ointment is not a good cleaning-agent for teeth.

Too Many Lessons - Too Little Time

Lesson 105 - Vacation is work

It has been such a long time since I had the time (or the brain power) to write down my most recent lessons...but now it is summer and I am on vacation from work so I have time. Vacation from work...now that is a funny thing to think about. Yes, I am on vacation from my career of teaching (even though I still have to check email, run reports and coordinate things for next year) but the idea of being on vacation from work cracks me up. When you think of vacation, what do you picture? A lounge chair, a quiet beach, and a margarita? Sitting on a balcony overlooking a Tuscan Vineyard drinking a nice glass of Pinot Noir? Regulating your five year old when he is trying to teach your 8 month old how to sit still long enough so he can do a flying karate jump over her head? This last one paints the picture of my vacation. Staying home all day with two sugars is definitely crazier - and more work - than actually going to work...and definitely not what I would call a 'relaxing' vacation. You all know this. My day starts at 6ish and doesn't end until...well, what time is it now? My son - now officially a 1st grader - has more energy in one karate move than I can find in a week. Pair that up with my daughter, who recently learned how (and thinks is HILARIOUS) to scream like a baby Pterodactyl any chance she gets. So needless to say...the day is nuts. Being the organized mom that I am, I have planned out 'fun' things to do each day with the kids so that they don't drive me to use a melon-baller on my left eye. I scoped out all the free movies, library reading days, free concerts in the park, movies at the lake, places we can go pick things... and I have the summer fun raring to go. The festivities start tomorrow - the first official day of Summer Break - so we'll see how that goes... and if my 'planning' lasts more than a week, or if I end up throwing it out the window and blowing up the baby pool in the backyard. I'm thinking that after this vacation, I am going to need a vacation.

So, the lesson in all of this is to not really expect to relax until your kids are grown, out of the house and married...yikes!

Lessons from a Working Mom-Lesson 104

Pooped Out!

The term pooped out is often used in reference to being really tired - and as a working mom with a five year old and a 4 month old, this term should be tattooed to my forehead. But not only am I pooped out figuratively, I am also literally pooped out. I have hit my Maximum Poop Capacity and can really not handle anymore....poop, that is.

Here is the situation: There is a crazy black cat that poops in my front yard EVERY SINGLE DAY! Now, I wasn't so irritated at first. I did some google searches about how to stop a pooping cat from leaving the load in your yard and tried a bunch of 'home remedies'. A few actually worked - until the cat decided that instead of using the flower beds or the grass, it would start utilizing the front step. When I saw this, I entered total attack mode. Armed with a squirt bottle, I made camp in my garage...waiting for the black dump-truck to enter my yard. As I was sitting there, packing heat with the water bottle, I contemplated why the cat poop situation had gotten me so fired up. I then realized it is because I had reached my Max. Poop Capacity. Dealing with wiping butts and changing diapers all day had made me - physically - not able to handle anymore poop....I am all pooped out. This had to be the reason why I was ready to start a war with the black cat over the defecation of my front step.....any added crap to my load would tip the manure wagon right over.

I have seen the cat since then and have chased it away...but haven't solved the poop overload situation yet - and probably won't for another 2-3 years, when my little sugar has learned the art of using toilet paper. Until then, no one better ask me to change their kids diaper for them....or pet-sit...

Lessons from a Working Mom-Lesson 103

Eating for Two

Many pregnant ladies like the idea that you are "eating for two" - it is a good way to justify the mandatory trip to the Cheesecake Factory at 10 o'clock at night. In reality, you aren't really eating for two because number two is the size of whatever type of fruit they compare your baby to each month it is in utero. Well, when you finally give birth and are breastfeeding - you really are eating for two. Not because you need to eat more (it does make you really hungry and thirsty!) but because whatever you eat gets passed to the baby. You eat broccoli - your baby is a little extra gassy. You eat a spicy crab roll with wasabi - your baby is a little extra fussy. And in my case, you eat dairy - your baby snorts like a little pig and gets all congested. That's right. I can't eat any dairy because it makes my sugar all snorty and snotty. Gross is right. And if that wasn't bad enough, because she can only breath through her nose when she eats, if she is all congesty then she can't eat. This leads to a really bad situation. 

Now, I don't drink milk and only eat yogurt on occasion (except for frozen yogurt which is my go-to!) but I LOVE cheese. Everything delicious has cheese on it - Pizza, Nachos, Cheesburgers, Turkey sandwiches with cheddar, potato skins, bean and cheese burritos, need I go on? To be unable to eat cheese is horrible!! It truly makes me sad :( Especially when I watch all my lovely family members porking down on some delicious pizza....and I am eating bread with sauce. No bueno. 

I tested this condition last week....Caite was breathing clear and loving life. I decided that the new BBQ Chicken Pizza at Round Table needed to be tested. Tasting this pizza was like finding my long lost love. I had half the large pizza myself. The next day, I had a baby with a large amount of boogers. So the verdict was correct - no dairy for me because I am eating for two. 

The lesson in all of this is that while I love cheese, I love my sugar more. That isn't something you hear everyday but it is a very powerful statement - "Baby, I love you more than Cheese!"

Lessons from a Working Mom-Lesson 102

A (working) mother's job is never done

Any mom knows that the day starts at dawn and doesn't stop until everyone is sound asleep. Between wiping noses and wiping butts there is hardly time to sit down or even eat (unless it is the leftovers off a high chair tray).  But any mom that has to deal with going to work as well as take care of everything at home knows that the combination of these two things adds a level of chaos. This chaos is maximized if you are a breastfeeding mom who has to pump at work. I fall into this category.

At work there isn't a desginated "mom" room...so we are left to fend for our breast-feeding selves. Some women pump in their car, some in the bathroom, one women even had to do it behind a shower curtain. Lucky for me, I have a locking office. Unluckily, though, even if the office is locked, people can come in through the adjoining classrooms. So every day this week I was "busted" in on during my pumpin'. The first two visitors were women so I wasn't too concerned. My last visitor - and the one that kind of iced the cake - was a man who didn't leave when I told him I was pumping and proceeded to sit and have a 20 minute conversation with the lovely sound of the pump keeping in tune with his words. I was mortified! Mostly because throughout the conversation, I became increasingly more aware that my hooter-hider wasn't in position and I was a little 'al fresco'. And to top that off....the conversation was certainly slowing the flow. 

I talked this situation over with a coworker and decided that an all staff email should be sent out to kind of make everyone aware that if the door is locked, please don't knock...and definitely don't come in through the side door - because, no matter who you are, a locked door doesn't mean "please try a different way in". So I send the email out...and it wasn't five minutes before responses were flooding my in box. Women were understanding, Men were freaked out. No eye contact is made now when it comes to the male workers on campus, unless it is because I am the butt of all jokes. Oh well! Better to be made fun of than to get busted in on. 

The lesson is that we breastfeeding-working the 9 to 5 and at home-moms are pumpin' with a purpose and our little sugar-pie-pops are going to be that much more well-off for us doing so....right? Right! 

Lessons from a Working Mom

Lesson 101 - Going Back to Work is REALLY not fun!

Don't get me wrong - I love my job -  but going back to work after having 11 weeks off is really not on the top of my super-fun-things-to-do list. I got home from work yesterday, after fighting the rain and 60 14-year-olds, and had to make dinner, help a five-year-old with Spanish homework, got peed on - changed my pants, got spit up on - changed my shirt, gave two kids baths, FINALLY got them in bed, graded some homework, sat with my husband on the couch for like two minutes and then went to bed. Then my alarm went off and it started all over again. 

I know - complain, complain, complain...blah, blah, blah....it could be totally worse.  I love my job, my kids, my husband, and my life - but finding the balance to deal with it all, is not coming easily. I am having a hard time even remembering what day of the week it is, let alone all the things that need to be done. 

I recently hung out with a wonderful woman from Canada. She told me that they all get 6 months paid time off to have a baby...and then have the option of taking off the rest of the year. She also told me in Europe that women get a whole year paid. I may be making a location change before baby number three...it's nice in Canada, right?

 

So, I guess the lesson in all of this is adjusting to being a working mom is no bueno. Hopefully in a few weeks, the routine will be in place - but for now, I am one toilet-scrub away from scooping out my eye with a spoon.

Welcome Baby Caite!

She's here! 8 pounds 2 ounces. Born on my birthday - October 27th